How to be a Writer - my story

The last year I have been obsessed with my Instagram, it’s been my little squares of happiness. A little place where I can daily ramble the on goings in my brain, it’s been like therapy.

I started it when I started my blog and it was my chosen platform for sharing my links and for promoting it, at one time I was addicted to the numbers, the likes and how many followers I had. I wanted to be an “influencer”, I wanted to be just like the mums I followed. Then the penny dropped.

These influencers we see on Instagram, don’t just do instagram. They are writers, business owners, mumterperners and only use Instagram as a fun place as an addition to their main jobs.

That’s when I decided to focus my energy into the why I had started this, my blog.

I want to be a writer; I have wanted to be a writer forever. I wrote stories in Primary school about children who had been evacuated from the city during the 2nd world war (I am crazy for history), I watched Carrie in sex and the city and thought what an amazing life she had as a writer (yeah yeah I know it’s not real but I was only 15) and I now watch Louis Theroux and Stacey Dooley and want to know, how do I get their job!!

I have always had such a massive imagination, I am a dreamer and dreamer’s heads are full of stories, memories and events that they relive over and over. Writing them down just seem like the most obvious next step.

For a long time I dreamt of being a mother, then I had Cora and I was a mother. I then dreamt of extending my family and after 3 long years of trying and loss, we had Cassi. I had achieved my dream. Having children had been my main focus for so long that I forgot about all the other things, I had put my heart, soul and womb into having those snot bags and it wasn’t until Cassi started to lose his baby-ness that I realised I had forgotten to focus on me, I felt like “just a mum”. So that was why the blog was born, so I could move on to the next dream.

What makes you a writer though? I don’t have a fancy degree from uni in literacy and I was sure as hell not going back to school! I have 3 already (I love learning), plus 8 years of studying and enough student debt to turn your hair white, so a blog seemed like a good starting spot to start writing.

If you look at the first few months of postings, my writing wasn't great. This was because I just didn’t have the experience or the strategies to do it. I jumped in without much thought, hoping by just writing I would get better. The truth is you will never get better by just wishing for it; I had to look deeper into the things I wanted to write about. I looked to those who inspired me; I would type random ideas in to the search bar and read everything that would come up on Google search so I completely understood what I wanted to write before I wrote it, I ate up every word, processed it and would set to work.

Most importantly though, I needed to put my bahookie in the chair and keep on writing, you can’t be a writer if you don’t write, right? You need to set time, like a normal job, so you can get the writing done. I write at least 3 new pieces a week, I don’t always use them but it helps me stay in a routine. I write for my blog, I write with the idea that they may appear on other site, I write like no one will read them.

The idea seems so simple but also completely unmanageable at times, life can feel like it’s in the way. Washing needs done, day job needs doing and at the end of the day the couch and trashy TV is screaming your name but if you want to get a head, you have to out your bum in that chair and write.

I am still trying to find my “niche”, I think its somewhere in-between parenting and lifestyle, maybe parenting lifestyle. It’s a saturated niche, you just need to type in the hashtag mum blogger and millions of hits come up. How do you stand out in a sea of perfect mum? If you know, please tell me because I think it’s up there with “what’s the meaning of life?”

What I have done is got myself out there, I may be shy face to face but I have pushed and pushed behind my keyboard. It’s my tool of massive destruction, my strategies is very simple, find the people I want to read my writing and get it in front of them. I have posted on many sites, applied for guest posts (some successful), promoted on social media and used every connection I have. It’s a slow growth but I think it’s working for me.

I didn’t tell my dreams of becoming a writer to anyone. I just started writing and didn’t stop. It didn’t matter what my friends and family thought, that didn't even enter my mind, I am also not embarrassed at the idea of them reading them either and It doesn’t matter what society thinks about it to me, I just don't care about that.

When it comes to writing, the only thing that matters is the pages in front of you. Billions of people write but only you can tell your story.

Now is the best time ever to become a writer. You don’t need anyone else's help to create and post; anyone can start a site and write about anything, from politics to the wonderful and unusual hobbies of the world. You don’t need a top publisher to tell you whether or not you’re a good writer, you can let your readers be the judge.

My dream is to build a small realm around my words. As the last year has now pasted, my skin is much thicker (wow, I have been hurt) , I was so naive in the beginning , because your closest friends can fail to see what you see in your words, sometimes you’ll get trolled for the things you write and also from people who genuinely think your work is bad. Eek!

In the beginning, I wondered why I wasn’t getting the hits, the views. I even had moments of wanting to give it all out but then I found out the average blog takes 6 years of consistent posting to become a success, I am only one year in. The truth is you need to write, a lot! Successful posts have up to 6,000 posts – I am nowhere close to that.

I have been on some “bloggers” pages and they have badly thought out landing pages and no more than 12 posts and wonder why they aren’t getting a head, it’s simple. You don’t write enough. FULL STOP!

I am not going to stop, I can’t stop. I have gotten into such a great flow; I have so much going on in regards to 2019 with my writing, I will be joining a blogging magazine as a monthly columnist and I have a little project (ok, its MASSIVE) coming up so look out for that. Could this be the year I become the next Stacey Dooley? Nah! I am just not that cool.

I would just like to thank all my readers for the love and support I have received, even though I think I would still be writing, the support makes it so much more worth while.

I wish everyone a happy New Year and lets make 2019 a bloody good one!!!