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Writer's pictureMumForce

The Fall of the Instamums?

Updated: Nov 16, 2019

Be Kind is what sprang to my mind in the last few days, in case you didn’t know the online world of the “instamums” has been shaken due to one of the biggest figures on the grid admitting to trolling other accounts, some of them her friends. Her reason? To make people like her better. She bullied a number of her friends – and even her own husband – by posting rumours and trolling comments about them on the forum. A number of influencers took to Instagram last night to share what has happened without naming.



Posting a statement on her stories, it read 'I know there are some rumours circulating and I want to take the opportunity to explain. Earlier this year I became aware of a website that had thousands of comments about my family and I. Reading them made me feel extremely paranoid and affected me much more than I knew at the time.'


The forum she used, I am familiar with, this is due to the fact I have also been trolled by other on this site. There is currently a petition to have the site removed due to allegations of bullying. At first, I was hurt and upset and then I decided to follow my pal Riona’s advice and “don’t read the comments”.


If you put your life out there for everyone then expect everyone to have an opinion, they have every right to have that idea – its now we react to it that shows the real strength.

Its easy to get lost in it all, especially if you think you won’t get caught. Yes, she bullied others but maybe it’s time to remember to be kind. We are yet to hear the whole story.

Us mummy bloggers get a hard time of it, when you look at these sites the words “grabby” and “desperate” are often used. The bigger accounts seemingly gifted everything on their back, in their home and accused of selling their child to make a buck. But tell me, if someone emailed you offering you the chance of a new hoover or school shoes for your child in return for a picture or a small review would you turn it down?


Let me take you back, I sort of fell into this world after turning to Instagram to find some online accounts that didn’t make me feel shit about my life. I had my blog, where I was writing about my struggles as a mum of two and my failing mental health and Instagram allowed me to connect with others who were feeling the same as me. This is not an unusual situation, thousands of parents log on for advice, support and laughs- they want to know that they aren’t alone in the middle of the night when everyone is sleeping, they can scroll and get some respite from the mundane. Do they hold all the answers? No, but somehow, they help.



The mummy bloggers are all over my feed, I follow each one for a different reason – crafts, maternal mental health, mum fashion and even funny memes. It feeds my nosiness, I enjoy seeing how other live their lives, what they do daily and the real-life struggles. I even like the ones that “seem” perfect, there pictures are beautiful, but I am under no allusion that its all rainbows and sunshine. We are seen as the laughing stock of the social media world, it seems that promoting yourself if you have a business is fine but having your grid showing your lifestyle and personal brand is crazy.


These mums are important though. They aren’t replacements for your family and supporting friends, but they are there 24/7 if you need them during those sleepy feeds, while your hiding on the toilet for 3 seconds of peace and during those times when you can’t watch another episode of Peppa brat. I personally love creative beautiful photos over the more real life one but it’s the captions of these real accounts that help me. Hearing the words of women struggling or empowering so helpful in my day to day.


Instagram makes it easy for other to connect, to find information, raise awareness and often helping people who feel isolated. So, say what you like about these mothers, but maybe just try and ease off. I know for a fact these women have helped more than just one person when they have felt alone in the darkness of their mind.

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